Sicksicksick

I've had a dry cough for about nine days now. Today was the worst so far, thanks to the bad air quality in Fresno; I had a really bad allergy attack on top of my mystery illness. I didn't sleep last night and chances are, I won't get much sleep tonight, although I did take a benadryl and about half a teaspoon of prescription-strength cough syrup. Cough syrup is one of those things I'll only take if I'm desperate and I know I'm pissing my family off, and I got to that point for the first time in probably years tonight. I hate taking medication of any kind, but I'll take what I need, and it's always the minimum. I didn't take a single pain killer when I got out of the hospital after having my gallbladder removed and only allowed them to give me half a dose of it when I was there. I truly dislike taking anything that'll fuck with me, cough syrup included.

I don't even know why I'm posting this. Is it because I'm awake with nothing better to do? Is it because the drowsiness is setting in and I'm feeling bad about taking medicine at all? I'm not into the whole "more-edge-than-thou" thing; hardliners break easier than those of us who don't have sticks up our asses, as far as I'm concerned. I firmly believe that I have a better chance at sticking to my lifestyle than a person who'd refuse medication during a surgery just to try and prove something. I have nothing to prove. I know I have no interest in drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, and promiscuity, and I have no desire to try and convince people of that on a daily basis because they know it as well as I do. (Also: I don't care if you've never so much as touched a beer bottle, if you sleep around, you aren't edge.)

My train of thought is insanely disjointed, I know, and I'm really not saying much of anything. That's the cough syrup talking.

SXR