Sicksicksick

I've had a dry cough for about nine days now. Today was the worst so far, thanks to the bad air quality in Fresno; I had a really bad allergy attack on top of my mystery illness. I didn't sleep last night and chances are, I won't get much sleep tonight, although I did take a benadryl and about half a teaspoon of prescription-strength cough syrup. Cough syrup is one of those things I'll only take if I'm desperate and I know I'm pissing my family off, and I got to that point for the first time in probably years tonight. I hate taking medication of any kind, but I'll take what I need, and it's always the minimum. I didn't take a single pain killer when I got out of the hospital after having my gallbladder removed and only allowed them to give me half a dose of it when I was there. I truly dislike taking anything that'll fuck with me, cough syrup included.

I don't even know why I'm posting this. Is it because I'm awake with nothing better to do? Is it because the drowsiness is setting in and I'm feeling bad about taking medicine at all? I'm not into the whole "more-edge-than-thou" thing; hardliners break easier than those of us who don't have sticks up our asses, as far as I'm concerned. I firmly believe that I have a better chance at sticking to my lifestyle than a person who'd refuse medication during a surgery just to try and prove something. I have nothing to prove. I know I have no interest in drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, and promiscuity, and I have no desire to try and convince people of that on a daily basis because they know it as well as I do. (Also: I don't care if you've never so much as touched a beer bottle, if you sleep around, you aren't edge.)

My train of thought is insanely disjointed, I know, and I'm really not saying much of anything. That's the cough syrup talking.

SXR

One day, two blogs.

As soon as the dates are released for the Portland Zine Symposium, I'll officially start planning my summer road-trip (which someone else will need to get in on; I can't afford to drive up there on my own). The itinerary will look something like this:

• Leave Madera and head to the Bay.
• Stay in the Bay for one or two days, depending on what's going on.
• Head up to Portland for at least the two days of the symposium, probably one or two more.
• Possibly head up to Seattle, just to check it out.
• Head back down and maybe spend another day or two in the Bay or Santa Cruz.
• Go home.

The entire trip should take about two weeks, I think. We'll see. I swear to god I'm gonna make it happen! I need to get out of here for a while, and the further I go, the better. Who's in?

SXR

Nothing ever changes.

Things have been pretty decent lately. I've managed to remain surprisingly zen through even the most stressful of shows and I've finally begun to adjust to being lonely. However, just when I think I'm really getting better, things get even worse. I'm back to constantly worrying about puking, back to picking at my scalp every single fucking time I drive home, and I've spent probably half an hour of my short day today crying. Just when I thought I was finally staying posi!

Random note, Last.fm is playing my ideal playlist right now: J Church, followed by Discount, followed by Chinese Telephones, then Fifteen. I think that despite my shitty day, I've died and gone to heaven.

Maybe I'll just never really be happy. I guess I handle stress better than I did for a long time, but every time I start thinking I've really made an improvement, days like today happen and I feel like all the work I've put into feeling better about things goes right down the drain. I know I just sound like a stupid, whiny kid, but I am; I'm not trying to deny it. Maybe I just need a vacation. I think I need a break from people, shows, school, family, technology... I need to be alone in the Bay for a week or so and just relax.

In closing, I have a migraine, my foot is bruised, and I'm having a terrible fucking day, but I'm listening to some fantastic music, which almost makes it all okay. I might waste some gas on a trip to Fresno for some alone-time at a cafe; that's my new coping mechanism. I'm about due for a mocha or something; it's been a few days.

SXR

Updates

• World History is a fantastic band. Check them out.
• When SEK plays, people puke everywhere.
• I decided today that I'm going to the National College of Natural Medicine to become a naturopathic doctor. This will probably be after I go to Mills for my MFA in Creative Writing. By the way, it's in Portland and has an epic cafe.
• Frooty Pebbles plus too much tofu plus mocha equals fucked up stomach.
• I'm on top of (most of) my school work.
• I should be in bed.
• The Bel-Tower is in its fifth month.

That's about it for now. I just felt like posting a brief blog about shit. I'm in a strangely good mood tonight and I have no idea why, but I'm not complaining.

SXR

Restless

I still feel unfulfilled. No surprise there. I expect to feel that way all my life.

Now that we haven't had shows every night, I've been especially restless. I have too much time to sit and do nothing, which is never good. If I could at least afford to go out and do something else, even just sit alone at a cafe, I'd be better off, but at the moment, I can't. However, I have managed to write seven or eight pages for a new zine that I'll probably never finish heh. It's actually going pretty well at the moment. This zine's about natural healing, and I'm not expert, but I'm trying to compile all the shit I've read in my years of hypochondria-fueled research.

I have a seven page fictional story due on March 2. Have I started it? Nope. Do I have any idea what I'm going to write? Nope. Will it probably end up another wanna-be Aaron Cometbus piece like my last one? Probably. I'm not punx.

In local news, shit sucks. Fights, threats, theft...

Fuck the world.

SXR

Resolutions?

I have a tendency to decide to do all of these really intense things for my own betterment and never do them, or I'll start them and never finish. That (eventually) has to stop! So, when I finally get around to it, I'm going to do all of the following:

• Go raw vegan for a week, like I've been saying I would for probably six months or more.
• Try gluten-free for at least a week.
• Cut out sugar ENTIRELY for a week and hopefully cut back by at least half for the rest of my life. (We'll see how that goes.)
• Go on a juice diet for a week.
• Do at least fifteen minutes of yoga a day instead of five or six.
• Cut half the dairy from my diet.
• Eat at least three times a day.

I'm serious about these things, damn it!

Constructing the Quintessential '90s Music Video

(This is just for fun and because I have too much time on my hands, as well as an intense love of the '90s.)

What makes the perfect '90s-style music video? Can it be recreated today? How might one recreate the vibe of a '90s video and what was it that made '90s videos so unique? We'll discuss these things and more today.

First, let's decide what elements essentially make up the perfect '90s music video. I believe them to be as follows:

• Bright colors, often brighter than one might usually see on regular TV programming.
• Footage of the band or artist performing in a small, square room.
• Obscure imagery, such as that of fish, stock film footage, et cetera.
• An obscure scenario.
• Some sort of debris or object falling from above.
• Switching between casual attire and formal attire.
• Animals.
• Facial close-ups, often with bright lighting.
• Men in dresses, gowns, makeup, or jewelry.

Can these elements be found in every '90s music video? Of course not; however, they can be found in many, and often times, a video will have most or all of these qualities. Let's take a look at a few examples. These are a few of my personal favorites.

Jawbreaker- "Fireman" (1995)

Note the obscure scenario, bright colors, shots from above and below, performance in a small room, dalmatian, objects falling from above, close-ups with bright lighting, and drag.


Green Day

Many of Green Day's videos are prime examples of the '90s music video. Many of their early videos include almost all of the elements listed above, and their music is often associated with the decade even today. Some of the best examples of this are as follows:

"Basket Case" (1995)

One would be hard-pressed to find brighter colors in a music video. This video also contains many of the other elements; these are easy to spot.

"Geek Stink Breath"


This video is an excellent example. It contains bright colors, facial close-ups, footage of performance in a small room, and bizarre dental imagery.

"Longview"


Another excellent example. Bright colors, small room performance, close-ups, monkey, and stock footage.


Other Examples

Of course, there are excellent examples of '90s videos outside of pop punk. Here are a few I find particularly fine specimens:

Soundgarden- "Black Hole Sun"



Perhaps one of the most well-known videos of the '90s, it contains many of the above elements.

Nirvana- "Heart Shaped Box"




Modern '90s-style videos

Rihanna's new video for "S&M" is a good example of a current interpretation of a '90s video. However, other videos have quite a few '90s elements, as well.

Aiden- "One Love"




Other good examples could include AFI's video for "Girl's Not Grey" and TV On The Radio's "Golden Age."